Bibliomancy: The Magic of Books

Bibliomancy is defined as the use of books in divination. If you'd like to know more about the history or practice of bibliomancy you can look here. I'll be talking about bibliomancy as a method for writers (which means I'll actually be talking about stichomancy, if only because my method involves using books selected at random.

The Method:

1. Select a book at random.
2. Open it to any page.
3. Point to a line.
4. Record it.
5. Stop when there's no more space on the page.

Like I said this is a method I use when inspiration is low or stress is high or some other sort of exasperatingly intangible thing is getting in the way of my writing. I write down lines or phrases that stand out to me when I read books. They're scribbled in notebooks. This is different.


When I get stuck the first time in the course of my "writing day", I pull out a fresh blank page.I play some music. Roll a cigarette, and stand before my bookshelves. I wait until something catches my eye. I open it, read what sentence I've pointed to, and either stuff the book back on the shelf or I write the line (or lines) down. Sometimes it's because its good or interesting. Sometimes it's because it's crap.

I keep the sheet next to me from that moment until I call it quits for the day. I write on it. I cross out things. It gives me something to think about besides what I don't want to think about (that I'm not writing).

Here are my lines from today:

Cervantes, Don Quixote, Part II, Ch. XVI

"The traveller drew in his rein, gazing in astonishment at the figure and face of Don Quixote, who was riding without his saddles."

Robertson Davies, High Spirits, p. 151

"A hundred and fifty years is a long time, you will agree, for a man to suffer misunderstanding and wrong."   (First line of short story.)

Yasunari Kawabata, The Lake, p107

"They had decided to write their messages at the bottom of the high wall where, hidden by grass, the writing would not be noticed."

Mervyn Peake, A Book of Nonsense, p 39

"I cannot give the reasons,

I only sing the tunes:

the sadness of the reasons

the madness of the moons."

William Styron, The Confessions of Nat Turner, p. 251

"He said keep thee from the evil woman, from the flattery of the tongue of a strange woman."

I've only made two notes so far about the lines from Robertson Davies' "High Spirits" - striking out "you will agree" because I don't like it for a myriad of reasons (It's hokey, breaks the wall between the reader and the first person narrator in a way I don't like, and because quite frankly I don't agree.) and that it's the opening line of a short story because I'm obsessed with first lines in writing. Something I know I've mentioned many times before.

But what's the point? Why am I making such a big deal out of it? Because after typing those lines into this post, I'm inspired again. I want to get back to writing now. I've also added "The Confessions of Nat Turner" to my reading list.

Any little bit helps, the saying goes. I believe that. I'm at a point now where I will never be able to read all the books I want to read or the books I should and maybe bibliomancy or the more appropriate stichomancy is about divining the future from books in a more religious context - but hey, whatever works.

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The Westerkerk's bell is ominous. . .

I haven't been blogging because this trip to be honest, I haven't been doing much of anything except staring at a Word document and wishing words of brilliance would just magically appear (they don't). Sitting in a bamboo chair with a bright purple cushion, staring out at the balcony full of plants (including a naughty plant), and the words aren't coming.

The backs of the houses I can see surround a private garden shared by those who have property on the street level called a hofje in Dutch that is sort of like a courtyard. In Amsterdam the most famous hofje is located on the Spui, called the Begijnhof. There will be, next to the Esprit Cafe a beautiful wooden door and a miniscule little sign. You might see people coming in and out of it. Go inside and take a look.

But for me this view is a bit like Hitchcock's Rear Window, except of course I hope I don't witness a murder. I can see so much of what is going on inside that it's too tempting to not look from time to time (and to be fair I leave the curtains open in case anyone wants to have a look at me). It does inspire me a bit since back at home the view I get when I look at the window is mostly windowless building walls.

So yesterday I got it in my head that I wanted to go scour the Waterlooplein market for vintage clothes. If you love vintage clothes, Amsterdam is a good city for it. Amongst the 9 Straatjes, the Nine Streets (in the Jordaan area) you have lots of shops, but also along the route to Waterlooplein on Nieuwe Hoogstraat there are plenty more including another location for Zipper, which does great mens vintage. On the Waterlooplein you can also find another Episode vintage store, but I think the one on Berenstraat is much better.

I start wandering toward the Waterlooplein, but first I need to withdraw cash. One thing that drives me a bit batty about Holland is that my French bank card isn't accepted at the Albert Hein grocery store or pretty much anywhere else and some of my other complaints are that finding a cash machine, post office, or tobacco shop are pretty tough to do without memorising what is where and how far from this or that.

For example I stay in the Jordan area near Elandsgracht. There are two cash machines on Elandsgracht. One inside the Albert Hein and one outside. There is a tobacco shop on the Elandsgracht, but it's for some reason usually closed which means I either have to go up to the Rozengracht (at Westerkerk) because there's a post office drop off box along the Prisengracht and a tobacconist on the Rozengracht near the other Albert Hein, which doesn't have a cash machine.

And that's just when I'm located at the flat. When I'm out and about, all the other locations come into play. I'm pretty sure how the Dutch handle it is they do everything in their neighbourhood before they go anywhere else. I've been trying to watch the ebb and flow of the locals in my neighbourhood a little bit, and I'm starting to get the sense that why the Amsterdam morning starts later than in Paris is partly for this reason. People are waiting for the tobacconist, post office, and banks to open up at 10 and 11 and since the cafes open at around 8 or 9 (compared to 5 or 6 in Paris), they have coffees and read newspapers while they wait?

These are just some of my observations and they certainly don't apply to all the Amsterdammers. I've seen men hauling garbage and cleaning sidewalks along Warmoerstraat as early as 6 am and there is one place that opens early to accomodate people who work earlier than people living in the posh Jordaan area called Renee's Croissants (it opens at 6h30).

I withdraw cash at Dam Square and continue eastwards. After hitting the shops at Nieuwe Hoogstraat, I continue on to Waterlooplein, but the first thing I pick up in one of the piles on the ground (which can sometimes be as cheap as 1,00 euro a stuk,  piece) that smells like . . . there is no other word for it than butt. It smelled like a dirty butt.

The smell turned me off of looking at clothes (must remember this for the future as was so turned off I could barely even look at my own clothes to put on pj's last night) and thus I turned to books. I turned to books big time.

By the time I arrived home (after a quick stop at the Albert Hein to buy things to cook for dinner) I bought:

The Finnegans Wake Experience, Roland McHugh, Irish Academic Press, 1 euro (Waterlooplein)

A Dictionary of Historical Slang, Eric Partridge, Penguin Reference Books, 5 euros (Book passage*)

Flash and Filligree & The Magic Christian, Terry Southern, 1 euro (Waterlooplein)

White Fang, Jack London, Nelson's Library edition, 4 euros (Book passage*)

Happy Days, Samuel Beckett, Evergreen/Grove, 4,50 euros (Book Exchange)

The Dream Life of Balso Snell &

A Cool Million, Nathaniel West, New Directions, 4 euros (Book passage*)

There's No Business, Charles Bukowski illustrated by R.Crumb, Ecco edition, 6 euros (Book passage*)

* Now let me tell you where this book passage is because it's not far from Waterlooplein and just south on the same canal as Book Exchange on Kloveniersburgwal.

The same booksellers that sell in the "book passage" seem to also make an appearance at the Friday booksale on the Spui. I went of course on Friday and bought three books.

A Good Man is Hard to Find & Other Stories, Flannery O'Connor, 4 euros

Enduring Love, Ian McEwan, 6 euros

The Best of Roald Dahl, hardcover, 5 euros

My favourites out of my two days worth of purchases so far are the Flannery O'Connor stories and the opening to Nathaniel West's The Dream Life of Balso Snell. They're both writers of the grotesques so that might be what appeals to me at this moment. I'm also still enjoying my flirtation with the Beats Burroughs and Kerouac. I'm also remembering why Roald Dahl is such an inspiration to me, hoping to find Anton Corjbin's art book Control in a used bookshop, and planning to write like mad today.

Or at least read.

The cat eats the naughty plant, and apparently that's okay for the kitty. Since I'm housesitting I'm also tending to the naughty plant and you have to break off any of the yellowing leaves, so I couldn't resist setting up this photo (and pressing one of the leaves into my notebook).

Speaking of which, I'll be blogging about my new notebook purchase next!

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The Write Stuff

In case you're at all interested in my writing process (or progress, which there is very little of at the moment sadly), here's a look at what's been kicking around my brain lately.

Sources of Inspiration:

This article in the Guardian has been giving me serious inspiration lately. http://www.guardian.co.uk/books/2010/feb/20/ten-rules-for-writing-fiction-part-one

I also feel heavily inspired by Henry Darger at the moment. I wrote a post about him recently that you can find here.

Robert Louis Stevenson's little book "The Art of Writing". "My First Book", about writing "Treasure Island" has inspired me since the moment I read it, thanks to Monsieur Redacteur who recommended it to me.

Reading William S. Burroughs' "Naked Lunch". The style is just brilliant.

Believe it or not, watching the movie adaptation of L.M Montgomery's "Anne of Green Gables". I saw myself as Anne when I saw it when I was a little girl and it's nice to see I remember what made me feel that way. I am rather dramatic.

Going away to Amsterdam to give my "mad plan" a try.

The Mad Plan

I have concocted this mad plan to write 5,000 words a day during my stay in Amsterdam minus travel days, and three days when people will be coming to visit, though I still plan on getting up early to write as much as I can; which means 5,000 words  x 18 days [would hypothetically] = 90,000 words or, a novel. If I can stick to it.

I've decided I won't edit for the entire period. I'll print the entire document in one go when I get back from Amsterdam and just see what I have. I of course will be using several sources to make sure I don't lose copies of this document such as email to send it myself, Google Docs, and a Darth Vader USB key.



Darth keeps my files safe.



In fact I'm going to plan my days like I'm on a retreat. Early morning walks after feeding and cuddling the cat I'm babysitting during my stay, lots of shopping in the markets for fresh vegetables and other healthy goodies, massages and floats at Koan Float, and an evening constitutional will be part of helping me achieve my mad plan.

Now don't think 5,000 words are by any means normal. The only writer I can think of off the top of my head who writes a healthy dose of "words per day" might be Stephen King. Joyce Carol Oates is also extremely prolithic, but I've never found anything on the details of her writing habits. But I think it's important to aim high. I will literally have nothing to do in Amsterdam except take care of a cat, myself, and write.

I'll be armed with my outline, the one that's been haunting me since my first trip to Amsterdam, which I am becoming more and more convinced is the story I most want to tell and am the most capable of telling.

Last September I told myself I was going to write a novel by September 2011. It reminds me a bit of college and being under the wire. It's exciting if nothing else to challenge myself. As long as I'm writing, that's what really matters in the end anyways.

One day I will type the two words I most long to type. "The End". I'm counting on Amsterdam to inspire me.

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My Hero of the Day is Monsieur Jean Genet

Yes I complained about Facebook yesterday, but today on my news feed was the greatest little video of an interview (or should I say, interrogation) of the writer Jean Genet courtesy of the BBC.

In the interview Jean Genet talks about "breaking the normal order of things". Not a big surprise considering that Jean Genet is one of the true rebels of literature who had a fascinating life. What makes it particularly interesting is that just a week ago a friend of mine came out to visit La Maisonette and I gave her "The Thief's Journal" to borrow telling her that if she wanted to know the mentality of a criminal, it wasn't a bad place to start.

I won't go into Genet's biography here, but simply leave you this inspiring video of Monsieur Genet. Yes he was imprisoned throughout his life from the age of 15, but also keep in mind that when he was sentenced to death he was spared because of petitions made to the French President on his behalf by Jean Cocteau, Pablo Picasso, and Jean-Paul Sartre. All because they pleaded, that to take Genet from the world would be a far more horrible injustice than the petty crimes he had commited.

It's not even 10 o'clock and I've already had a discussion with another writer I know in Colombia about writing and how to help each other with writer's block (which is called o terror de la pagina blanco apparently in Spanish, though he might have been taking some liberties). I wish I'd seen this video before so I could have sent it to him as he is also a big fan of Genet.

So today's inspiration is break the order of things. Which would do me a lot of good considering that now that I've outlined my entire book from start to finish I've been unable to write since. Perhaps today I will casse my writer's block, which Genet called la petite bête*.

*la petite bête is what the French call a jeux de mot so in this instance I don't think Genet meant l'appetite  bête so I can only assume he meant writer's block is "the little penis". See, I told you he was a genius.

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10 Things I Want Right Now

  Not just things mind you, but things. Welcome to the world of New Consumerism. Resistance is futile.

1. The Death Star Cookie Jar - $49.99

As a big fan and one time possessor of an original piece of the Death Star used in TESB (I sold it on the boards when my dog's eating chocolate cost a Mini Cooper in vet bills), the idea of eating homemade chocolate chip oatmeal cookies from a Death Star packs a massive amount of appeal (and calories because until the novelty of getting said fattening cookie out of said Death Star wore off, I'd probably eat them non-stop). It's also an officially licensed Lucasfilms collectible, made of ceramic, and very detailed. Plus if worse came to worse I could theoretically simply miniaturise myself, get into an X-wing, and blow the thing up.

2. Star Wars MP3 Alarm Clock Lamps - $49.99

Wake up with Bobba Fett and Darth Vader in a way that won't make you feel like you have to do the Imperial Death March of Shame. I honestly can't decide which one I'd want more, which means I probably want the Bobba Fett because even after over a decade since his tragic and pathetic death in ROTJ and his subsequent presence in the "prequels" that raped my childhood I am still a massive fan of Bobba and wouldn't mind having him wake me up, play my MP3 player, or provide me with a source of light for some late night reading. Plus the possibility of having someone say, "Hey turn Bobba Fett off already and go to bed" is a prospect I find highly amusing.

3. Kinetic Magnetic Suspension Sculpture by Bruce Gray - $7000

If you're like Pepper Potts and into kinetic sculptures, this one is a real beauty. Made by L.A. area artist Bruce Gray of  super high powered industrial rare earth (NdFeB) neodymium iron boron magnets on the ends of the cords that hold the magnets in place by magnetic force alone. While it doesn't have the visual display of the kinetic sculpture that made its cameo in Iron Man 2, this one did appear in Austin Power's The Spy Who Shagged Me, which was if only by a small margin, a much funnier film. It's also $6770 cheaper.

4. Astronaut Ice Cream - $3.99

NASA has apparently made one giant leap for mankind in the field of ice cream. Back when I was a kid and astronaut ice cream was all the rage we only had Neopolitan flavoured. Now there's mint chocolate chip and chocolate chocolate chip to chose from. Not sure if they've made any progress on making it feel less like you're eating styrofoam, but considering the amount of research that went into astronaut ice cream and the likely cost of this research - the fact that it's still cheaper than a pint of Ben & Jerry's Chocolate Fudge Brownie Sundae and has been to space makes it really, really cool. Even if it isn't temperature-wise.

5. An Ant Megapolis - Cost Uncertain

Why settle for an ant farm when you can have an ant megapolis? This bad boy is 50 square meters big and goes 8 meters into the earth. Sort of kills the enthusiasm I once had for simply trying to capture a queen and a few workers to chuck into a fish tank. Now I'm thinking bigger. I'm thinking I want the Dubai of ant hills. Then I want to fill it with 10 tons of concrete and just stare at it like a sculpture. Sure millions of ants would die in the process, but fuck 'em. They invaded a few weeks back and they abandoned their takeover in the time it took to run to the grocery store and stock up on ant traps. They deserve to die for my amusement.

6. For people to stop writing Big Bang Theory (as in the TV show) related fanfiction - Priceless

I understand. We all love The Big Bang Theory. It is without a doubt the best show currently on television, but sometimes love can be bad. Really bad. Please stop because I keep accidentally finding BBT fanfiction whenever I try to look up where to buy Sheldon's awesome t-shirts. You are crossing a line. There's extemely geeky and funny and then there's extremely geeky where you reference sewing your own ComicCon costume while your tears of joy asborb into the rather absorbent fabric you bought to make your Hobbit costume. In the words of Dr. Sheldon Cooper Ph.D. himself, "Bazinga, I don't care."

But no seriously. Howard and Raj are never going to have sex. Just cut it out.

7. X-Men #1 signed by Stan Lee - $101,000

A 9.4 (comic book rating for condition) X-Men #1 sold at auction a few years back for $101,000. It was not signed by Stan Lee, but this is my wish list and on my wish list my 9.0 or higher X-Men #1 would be. I've not only been a long time fan of X-Men (and still am despite the movies mucking things up), but also of Stan Lee. I loved his little column where we answered questions and talked about his art in his comic books.

I would accept should Stan Lee should not deem me worthy a 9.0 rated All-American Comics #16 because while the X-Men are my favourite comic books of all time, The Green Lantern is still my favourite superhero. GL might have ousted all the X-Men from my affections, except I never really liked the idea of GL joining the JLA and well, let's face it Jean Grey as the Dark Phoenix was just too awesome.

8. 2 Tickets on Virgin Galatic - $400,000*

*Once it's been thoroughly tested and the chances of my dying painfully in space with a guest are as minute as dying (knock on wood) in a plane crash.

I'm not sure if every kid wanted to be an astronaut, but I sure did. Now every former kid with $200,000 can soon be launched into space courtesy of Richard Branson's Virgin Galatic. While the website isn't clear how long you hover in space before you come floating back down to earth like a shuttlecock (the plane's landing system is based off of that little net-ball thing you hit in badminton) and you apparently have to don some kind of helmet that looks more appropriate for riding a Kawasaki Ninja motorcycle than for keeping you from suffocating in the vacuum of space - I say why not?**

** Once again let me state only after it's been thoroughly tested and the chances of me and my guest dying painfully in space is no longer an issue.

9. To spend 3 months sailing from Thailand to New Zealand - Cost unknown, but pretty expensive.

Ideally the trip's itinerary would be: Start in Bangkok, stock on cheap stuff, rent a sailboat with a small crew and sail to Indonesia. (Yes I can sail.) After a few days break in Indonedia to stock up, make a brief stop in Papua New Guinea (to see my friend who is collecting rare orchids or something), then one more quick sail over the Coral Sea to Australia. Then presumably the last two months would be spent sailing the coast of Australia and sailing to Tasmania and New Zealand.

Of course I'd have to brush up on just about everything from sailing to how to get provisions to water depths, which isn't normally on a pre-vacation checklist, but whenever I think of adventure I think of Australia. I'm pretty sure it's because of having seen Crocodile Dundee I, II, and III as a kid. No wonder why Paul Hogan was awarded "Australian of the Year".

10. Betsy Lerner as my literary agent - 10% of everything I make for as long as I make it

I don't know why I want Betsy Lerner as my literary agent, not really. It's partially because I read her blog religiously (including the archives) and because of other writers she has represented (through the agency Dunow, Carlson, & Lerner as well as prior to her forming an agency with her partners). I have a gut feeling about her. I don't know her, have never met her, and yet somehow I think we'd get on well.

The problem is that the real cost of acquiring such a literary agent as Betsy Lerner is that I must sit down and write an amazing book. I must write a smash debut novel and several others and several more to keep such an agent as Betsy Lerner. But first and foremost I must write my debut novel which costs time, energy, patience, and of course a little bit of money for the bills, food, and the cigarettes I smoke obsessively whilst writing.

They say women never know what they want, but I do. I want my life to be full of the whimsy that a Bobba Fett MP3 Alarm Clock would bring me in the morning. The adventure of sailing in shark (and saltwater crocodile) infested waters. The fulfillment of a lifelong dream to go into outer space. I want to be amused constantly and enchanted and to achieve my goals and dreams.

At the end of the day the answer to the age old question of what women want is very simple. We want what we want when we want it, which is usually right now if not sooner.

I think Freddie Mercury said it best. "I want it all...and I want it now".

What do you want?

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Stumble of the Day

Now that I've decided to blog not just because I have a helluva lot of things I want to say, but also as a writing tool (whether it's to keep me writing even when I'm blocked on my oeuvre or able to be used later when I'm *crossed fingers* published) I've been paying a lot more attention to the Internet in general, mostly because I've decided to be more a part of it then leaving comments on my friends Facebook pages.

No one starts a blog bcause they don't want someone to read it. Right?

So I troll the World Wide Web via StumbleUpon. Partly because I can select what I'm interested in seeing and partly because when I tried to stumble around Blogger in a similarly haphazard fashion I kept getting blogs about Jesus or blogs written by extremely patriotic Vietnamese teenagers. StumbleUpon is convenient and allows me to like stuff I can sort through later to see if I want to read or research something I was for the 10 seconds I glanced at it, extremely interested in. I'd like to become one of those nifty people who reads blogs all the time so StumbleUpon helps me discover blogs I might not otherwise because my desires have yet to supercede my ability to be really, really lazy.

Which leads me to the Stumble of the Day!!! Today's Stumble is brought to you by The Wondrous and if you visit the site right this minute you will be treated to a bevvy of bikini clad babes bearing bare bellies*. So hurry or just search their site for bikini babes via their search function. It's wondrous.

*I just love alliteration, don't you?

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